


Beauty & The Bee

by imstupidwithlove



Category: Mean Girls - Richmond/Benjamin/Fey
Genre: The bee was not harmed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-11
Updated: 2019-09-11
Packaged: 2020-10-14 20:36:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20606930
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imstupidwithlove/pseuds/imstupidwithlove
Summary: just pure dumbasserymost of it is copied from an actual conversation, it was almost midnight, we were sleep deprived. that's our only excuse





	Beauty & The Bee

**Author's Note:**

> https://youtu.be/sY48nEwHI-4 helpful to listen to this whilst reading
> 
> no bees were harmed!

damian - gaymian

janis - snarkisian

cady - daddy

_11:19pm_

daddy: i

daddy: heck

daddy: oh no

daddy: yall

gaymian: what happened

snarkisian: caddy what

daddy: so i have a glass of water next to my bed right?

daddy: and i wanted to drink from it so i took a sip and uh. uh

daddy: there’s a dead bee in it

snarkisian: WHAT

gaymian: WHAT

snarkisian: I THOT I KNEW THE DIRECTION THIS WAS GOING IN BUT YOU TOOK ME BY SURPRISE

daddy: i drank water with a dead bee in it and now i feel even more thirsty

daddy: the bee did me dirty

snarkisian: it’s barry

daddy: n

daddy: no

daddy: my throat feels so dry now

snarkisian: so what you’re saying is the bee didn’t make you wet

gaymian: janis no

snarkisian: it’s a yes or no question

daddy: no, it didn’t make me wet

snarkisian: aw that’s a shame

snarkisian: and you were so thirsty too

daddy: truly i WAS all i wanted was a simple sip of water

snarkisian: but instead you got something much better ;)

_11:26pm_

daddy: yall this BEE it dried up my throat so much

snarkisian: drink some water

gaymian: BEE water

_11:28pm_

daddy: okay but

daddy: the fact that the bee is still in the water

snarkisian: throw it out??? caddy what are u doing with your life

daddy: i don’t want to get up though

daddy: look no one expected there to be a bee in the water

daddy: and yet

daddy: There She Is

snarkisian: get r i d of it

_11:40pm_

daddy: my life went downhill after the bee

daddy: this is something the husband in the bee movie would say

snarkisian: caddy

daddy: yes?

daddy: also y’all

snarkisian: if i see you say the word bee one more time istg

daddy: i was thinking about what the name of the bee movie was and i forgot

daddy: so i typed the bee movie and realised! that is actually the title!

snarkisian: what the fuck is this conversation even

daddy: i’m not sure

daddy: how is damian the most normal one here

snarkisian: caddy you’re one of the people who just has mii music playing in their head all the time but they’re still surviving somehow

snarkisian: somehow damian is always the most normal one

gaymian: shockingly

daddy: that is me

daddy: now i can’t stop thinking about it

snarkisian: about what

daddy: the mii music it’s playing in my head

snarkisian: listen to it

daddy: oh yes!

snarkisian: i’m listening to it rn it’s a bop

snarkisian: also all of our conversations but the mii music is playing over them would be such comedy gold

snarkisian: actually i can edit that

snarkisian: what are we doing with our lives why am i crying

gaymian: tears of wisdom

snarkisian: listening to mii music while talking here is such an experience m

gaymian: i don’t even know where to start here

daddy: doo do dooooo do do

snarkisian: WHY DID THAT KILL ME

gaymian: i wish i could blame our conversations on sleep deprivation but i honestly just don’t

gaymian: know at this point

daddy: i

daddy: HECK

daddy: TALL

daddy: YALL*

daddy: YALL

snarkisian: is it the bee

gaymian: Tall.

daddy: the BEE

daddy: is MOVING

snarkisian: WHAT

daddy: ITS NOT DEAD ???????

daddy: HEXKFJFJJF

snarkisian: WHAT

daddy: I GOTTS TO SAVE HER

gaymian: OH MY GOODNESS GIVE THE POOR THING SOME COMFORT!!

snarkisian: you don’t understand what listening to mii music while reading that is like

daddy: so apparently. i drank water with an alive bee in it

_daddy sent is_she_okay.jpg_

gaymian: it’s probably so traumatised

daddy: do i dry her off with a little towel what do i do

gaymian: i don’t know i’m not a beet

daddy: this isn’t a beet it’s a bee

gaymian: i meant beekeeper but i couldn’t remember the words so i mixed bee and vet

snarkisian: hi sorry I had to go drink water bc my stomach hurt from laughing

daddy: i can’t tell if she’s dead

daddy: what are we doing

snarkisian: poke her

snarkisian: it’s the mii music it’s killing me

gaymian: do NOT poke her

snarkisian: this is so funny i can’t explain

snarkisian: i can’t put it into words

gaymian: just. google it

snarkisian: i’m always gonna listen to mii music when i talk to y’all now

daddy: so i SHOULDNT poke?

snarkisian: no poke it

daddy: yes i did

snarkisian: did it move

daddy: no

gaymian: i

snarkisian: THE BRIDGE CAME ON JUST WHEN U SAID NO

_gaymian left the group chat_

snarkisian: ??? damian??

daddy: YALL IT ISNT LOOKING GOOD FOR HER

snarkisian: kill her

_gaymian joined the group chat_

daddy: well how do i know she isn’t already dead

gaymian: sorry i needed a second

snarkisian: make a little funeral

snarkisian: by that i mean throw her in the trash while whistling mii music

daddy: oh yes!

gaymian: maybe she’s not moving because she’s frightened

daddy: HFJSHDJDHDKDJ

snarkisian: what

daddy: IT MOVED WHAT

daddy: YALL ITS WALKING

snarkisian: WHAT

daddy: ITS CLIMBING UP THE SINK

gaymian: get a glass

_daddy sent SHES_ALIVE_WHAT.jpg_

gaymian: help her out the window

snarkisian: OH MY GOD

daddy: ITS MOVING!! SHE SURVIVED

gaymian: SHE DID

daddy: i’ll bring her outside!

daddy: she’s crawling away from me

_daddy sent shes_leaving_me.jpg_

daddy: i poked her one too many times

daddy: what is she DOING

snarkisian: now finish her off

gaymian: NO

daddy: nO

snarkisian: damn

gaymian: just. get a glass and some paper

daddy: SHE WONT CRAWL ON THE TISSUE BOX

snarkisian: just kill her already this is boring

snarkisian: she caused u pain caddy she made you suffer

snarkisian: get your revenge

daddy: she won’t get on the tissue box

gaymian: trap her in the glass, shift the paper under her and put her outside

snarkisian: she wants to die

daddy: i can’t believe i nearly drank a live bee

snarkisian: i can

gaymian: don’t kill her!!

daddy: imagine if i hadn’t noticed

snarkisian: the bee would go straight into u

daddy: i am this close to poking her onto the box

snarkisian: do it

gaymian: just use a GLASS

gaymian: bees are delicate please be gentle

daddy: she’s rubbing her little footies

gaymian: her wings could get hurt and she wouldn’t be able to go home

gaymian: if this bee doesn’t get home safe i’m going to sue you all

snarkisian: she doesn’t have a home

gaymian: she does!! she has a bee hive!

snarkisian: if she did she wouldn’t attack our very dear friend caddy

snarkisian: sounds suspicious

snarkisian: bees with homes don’t do THAT

_daddy sent safe_and_outside.jpg_

daddy: i brought her outside!!

gaymian: yes!! say goodbye, let her go home!

snarkisian: just throw her into the air already oh my god

daddy: i left the tissue box outside because she wouldn’t leave

snarkisian: are you serious

gaymian: maybe she doesn’t want you to see her fly

snarkisian: just catapult her

gaymian: maybe she’s embarrassed

daddy: she’s embarrassed

snarkisian: oh my god i hate you both

gaymian: BEES HAVE RIGHTS TOO JANIS

gaymian: THEYRE DYING

daddy: i can’t believe that tonight i am a hero

daddy: i saved a bee, a damsel in distress

daddy: after nearly drinking her of course

snarkisian: i’m gonna cry

gaymian: THEYRE IMPORTANT TO THE ENVIRONMENT!! THEY DESERVE TO BE TAKEN

gaymian: CARE OF AND CARED FOR

snarkisian: is this what slytherin/hufflepuff friendships are like

gaymian: slow burn, enemies to lovers, 100k

snarkisian: i said friendships

daddy: platonic is more boring though

gaymian: caddy x the bee

daddy: no

snarkisian: oh YES

daddy: i set her free

gaymian: what would the title be

snarkisian: the beauty and the BEE

daddy: you think i’m a beauty? how sweet of you!

snarkisian: no you’re the bee


End file.
